Cool, Calm & Contentious - read free eBook in online reader or directly download on the web page. Select files or add your book in reader. Download and read online ebook Cool, Calm & Contentious write by Merrill Markoe. This book was released on 2012-08-07. Cool, Calm & Contentious available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. “This is so well written. [When a book like this] comes along, it’s, like, ‘Thank you!’ What a great way to spend an afternoon, an evening, reading these essays. . . . Absolutely great.”—Jon Stewart “[Merrill] Markoe is easily as funny as David Sedaris. She’s capable of manic riffs and acerbic skewering. Still, her good nature shines through.”—The Washington Post In this hilarious collection of candid essays, including two pieces new to this edition, New York Times bestselling author Merrill Markoe reveals much about her personal life—as well as the secret formula for comedy: Start out with a difficult mother, develop some classic teenage insecurities, add a few relationships with narcissistic men, toss in an unruly pack of selfish dogs, finish it off with the kind of crystalline perspective that only comes from years of navigating a roiling sea of unpleasant and unappeasable people, and—voilà—you’re funny! Cool, Calm & Contentious is honest, unapologetic, sometimes heartbreaking, but always shot through with Merrill Markoe’s biting, bracing wit. “This has been a great year for funny women. . . . Let’s call Tina Fey and Mindy Kaling exhibits A and B. Both owe a debt to those who came before, including Merrill Markoe.”—The Boston Globe “Markoe’s goal is to find the absurdity in everyday life. That, coupled with her sharp wit, makes her writing sublime.”—BookPage “Laugh-out-loud humor.”—Tampa Bay Times “Not only crazy-funny, but crazy-heartbreaking.”—The New York Times
Cool, Calm and Contentious
Cool, Calm and Contentious - read free eBook in online reader or directly download on the web page. Select files or add your book in reader. Download and read online ebook Cool, Calm and Contentious write by Merrill Markoe. This book was released on 2011. Cool, Calm and Contentious available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. The best-selling author of Nose Down, Eyes Up presents an original collection of personal essays that celebrates the ridiculousness of topics ranging from losing one's virginity and managing a crazy mother to navigating narcissistic egos and humoring selfish canine companions.
Merrill Markoe's Guide to Love
Merrill Markoe's Guide to Love - read free eBook in online reader or directly download on the web page. Select files or add your book in reader. Download and read online ebook Merrill Markoe's Guide to Love write by Merrill Markoe. This book was released on 1998. Merrill Markoe's Guide to Love available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. A zany look at the world of romance and love shares the author's observations on sex seminars, dating, the secrets of seduction, and marriage.
What the Dogs Have Taught Me
What the Dogs Have Taught Me - read free eBook in online reader or directly download on the web page. Select files or add your book in reader. Download and read online ebook What the Dogs Have Taught Me write by Merrill Markoe. This book was released on 2011-08-24. What the Dogs Have Taught Me available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Award-winning comedy writer Merrill Markoe, the slightly warped mind behind Stupid Pet Tricks, is an old hand with dogs. She knows who’s boss (they are) and the myriad ways a loving pet can make you feel guilty twenty-four hours a day. This new edition of Merrill Markoe’s classic collection of humorous essays gives readers the choicest selections along with brand-new material. In these razor-sharp essays, Markoe recounts her dogs’ phone chats with animal communicators, her search for past lives, and her brief stint as a stun gun saleswoman. She describes the workshop that taught her how to launch an Internet porn business and another that gave proper instruction in the esoteric art of becoming a dominatrix. She shares insight into what it is like to structure your day using only dog rules, how to spot a really horrible restaurant, and what it’s like to have a romantic dinner with Fabio. There’s even a bright side to preparing for the apocalypse: “At last, it is time to forget about fat grams and low cholesterol.” This enchantingly rambunctious and boundlessly enjoyable book gives you Merrill Markoe at her best. You’ll devour it in one sitting (and so may your pet).
The Psycho Ex Game
The Psycho Ex Game - read free eBook in online reader or directly download on the web page. Select files or add your book in reader. Download and read online ebook The Psycho Ex Game write by Merrill Markoe. This book was released on 2007-12-18. The Psycho Ex Game available in PDF, EPUB and Kindle. Lisa Roberty is a successful screenwriter with an impoverished social life who’s enduring a demoralizing job at the mind-numbing sitcom You Go, Girl. Grant Repka is an obscure indie rock musician who, in his forties, finds his career surprisingly resurrected with the success of his comic operetta about the doomed romance of Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson. When Grant and Lisa meet after one of his shows, sparks don’t immediately fly—but e-mail addresses are exchanged. A my-book-for-your-CD trade and a couple of e-mails later, Lisa tells Grant that she enjoys his song “My Psycho Ex,” but warns him that where psycho-exes are concerned, she’s pretty sure she “could drink him under the table.” Little does she know that this will become the opening salvo in an epic e-mail battle dubbed the Psycho Ex Game, a storytelling competition in which horrific tales of dysfunctional love and living with lunatics are volleyed with glee. The rules are simple; the point system, unique: the experiences that would normally leave someone running for the therapist’s office (humiliation, degradation, and complicity in psychotic behavior) just might win match point in the Psycho Ex Game. Now it’s Grant vs. Lisa as the wretched tales of his ex, the Junkie Queen of Darkness, vie with the woe inflicted by her ex, a tantrum-throwing actor/director widely known as Mr. Summer Box Office Record-Holder. As the correspondence evolves, it surprises Lisa by offering her the kind of intimacy she has never shared with a man in the same room. Before long, what started as a friendly competition becomes a road map to an unlikely couple’s growing involvement, leaving both Grant and Lisa secretly wondering, “If we were to get involved, which one of us is potentially the next Psycho Ex?” Written in alternating he said/she said chapters, The Psycho Ex Game is shot through with the acerbic humor of Merrill Markoe and the mordant observations that have made Andy Prieboy a literate voice in rock. The Psycho Ex Game is a hilarious dissection of injuries sustained on the front lines of romance—and the careful nursing that gets us battleready once again.
